That was lost. This is found

(That was then–Josh Wilson)

so I had a list of things I wanted to write about when I got a chance…however, although said list is not currently lost, I have no idea what I wanted to write about, because I couldn’t read my own handwriting…that’s what I get for writing in big sloppy print all over the page because it is faster…yeah, faster, but very ineffective if I am going to want to know what I intended to write about…

Things I have learned recently: even if you are overwhelmed and life seems to be falling apart and you are trying to put all your energy into just making it day to day…please give at least a cursory glance to your mail…so as I was looking for something I needed in my room, I discovered a pile of unopened mail…and one of the items from last summer was a notification that if I didn’t call Fidelity to continue to opt out of a retirement account that I was going to start having paycheck deductions for a retirement account starting in February…I didn’t exactly intend to start a retirement account until I graduated from college…but I guess I now have other plans…oh well…I suppose it doesn’t really matter that much since if I understood the letter correctly it is only like 1% of my income or something like that…

Also, I am learning to emotionally protect myself…there is no reason to constantly surround myself with triggers of memories of how badly I have been hurt…so a post-it note that still was plenty sticky and had lots of extra space left to write was thrown away because it was a reminder that brought waves of hurt back over me every time I saw it next to my bed…that post it note had a name and phone number on it that reminded me of a very dark time in my life…the person’s name on the post-it note I never met and she may very well be a very nice person, but I have no reason to go looking to meet her, and seeing that post-it constantly made me feel sorrowful, and that is not a good thing…I refuse to let past abuse permanently take over my life. If we can’t use our big kid words and be nice to each other then I am not going to let you keep knocking me over while I just wait passively for you to do it again. That is a lousy way to live, and I refuse.

On Thursday I learned why you don’t text as you are walking down the stairs of the parking ramp…because if you are already kind of klutzy, trying to text tends to lead to falling and walking into things…so it kinda should wait, even if you really really miss your Thursday friends…As much as I love summer, I also look forward to the school year, because I now have a lot of friends at school that I really really miss…

I think Friday was idiot driver day…oh my…people going on red, the person in front of me for a while stopping on green, getting almost hit twice in the roundabout that I wasn’t even dawdling in, someone using the shoulder of the road as an extra lane to avoid traffic, some jerkface not letting me get over a lane to get off the freeway, someone using the leftlane to drive 20 miles under the speedlimit…just to name a few of the dumb things I saw…

I see this building every time I go to work that says Sun Country on it, so it is no surprise that there was some airplane thing going on over there, but I had never actually SEEN an airplane over there before, but now there are a jillion airplanes parked over near the building, and on my way home from work a few days ago I saw over 20 airplanes…which is kind of distracting, but really fun…

Also, I am working almost full-time at the moment at my job at home which I LOVE LOVE LOVE…and I am working hours here and there on a project for school…I haven’t unpacked fully, I haven’t started my schoolwork, and I haven’t even put my bike back together, but working is so much fun…(but my teachers won’t think it is so much fun for me to not complete my assignments, and I will be really disappointed if I don’t get some bike time at some point, so I think I am pretty close to the limit of how much I can handle…

Oh, and check out this awesomesauce fundraising campaign for a cause I believe in: caring counseling open to anyone in need.

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