Thought I had it all right ’til the road went left

(Backseat Driver—TobyMac)


There is a Christmas musical called Fear? Not! that I adore…so this is what studying sounds like at my apartment (interspersed with the granny rap from The Plane Truth)…I wish I had the tape with me except I don’t so I found mp3’s online, ’cause apparently I currently only have Truth Works and Sermon on the Mound…sports themed musicals are okay too, but the Christmas ones are my favorite (at least for the moment)…If I could listen to the entire musical of Fear? Not! and The Plane Truth all day every day I would be one happy girl for a long time…


I saw this on a blog last week: Don’t be discouraged when you have a setback—a setback means there was progress! Celebrate the success!—this is such an awesome reminder that saying oops and moving on in super important! Yeah, I messed up this time, but I worked really hard and if it was possible to forget the information then clearly there was learning that took place even if my mind went blank when the time to put that learning onto an exam came up…and so many other arenas in which I feel I face setbacks a lot, and this is just a really good reminder that a setback means there is progress.


I’m one of those people who looks at my school print account and realizes that I have over 450 pages left and the extras don’t roll over to the next semester…I have literally printed books first year when there were a couple books I had been reading as a pdf for a class and decided that perhaps for the final on which I could use notes I might like a copy of the book…


I think it is super dumb that the pages don’t carry over from one semester to the next…just going to say I’ve seen people print blank pages or pages that are just completely black just for the sake of feeling like they got their money’s worth since it is use it or lose it…perhaps we’d have fewer issues with the printers constantly being jammed or out of paper or ink if the pages rolled over to the next semester…I am fine with just losing the prints since clearly I don’t really need them, and also don’t really want to bring reams of paper home with me, but it would be nice to keep them so just in case I had more printing needs one semester and thus needed more prints I wouldn’t start having to pay for them…


Sometimes I am very childish…inside my head a few days ago I said to myself “hey look! She has shoes to match her personality” when I saw someone wearing little-girls-style dress shoes…but I found it kind of hilarious because my mom has tiny feet and therefore has trouble finding dress shoes that aren’t that sparkly black of childhood and this person with feet that are definitely big enough to shop in the adult section was intentionally wearing a children’s style.


Also, when I am stressed out my inner child becomes more apparent…impulsive, uncontrollable giggling, talking too much on random topics…this is why people don’t like me…


On Friday there were free cookies at hot box. It was kind of exciting. I also almost got myself killed because I was s excited that I forgot to look both ways before crossing the street…see paragraph above about impulsivity…


Sometimes when I am talking to someone I start to realize that I probably should actually listen to myself sometimes…some of the stuff I say is actually really good truth…Last Saturday I was talking about grades and I said a lot of things…but the ones that are really smart that I need to be listening to where the facts that if you take all the stuff that is an opinion out of my grades then I have really rocking solid grades…I just need to work on better reading my teacher’s minds and I’ll do super awesome in school…anyone know how to learn ESP? JK…what that really means is that I shouldn’t be so hard on myself because if I rock the objective stuff then clearly I know the stuff even if my overall grade disagrees…the other really smart thing that came out of my mouth was in reference to my therapeutics grade…I did really lousy on the first exam (because I made one mistake that caused the entire rest of my answers to be wrong) and the first quiz I got a 0% (because I didn’t understand what they wanted me to do with the grid in the question) and another early quiz I got 40% (because there were some other things going on that needed my attention and while physically I was in class, mentally I was miles away…approximately 5 miles…so to be able to go from that to on the border of an A, clearly I do know my stuff (and it is really really scary to post anything that tells anyone what my grades are on the internet, because in the past people knowing my grades has allowed me to be hurt, but I am going to admit that every exam since the first one I have done fine on including 98% on the third exam which would have been 100% if I read one of the questions more closely…it is scary to post my grades on the internet, but at the same time it is freeing to not have to keep them secretly locked up inside)…and while grades are important to prove that you know stuff, once you are in the work world long enough, people care if you actually know stuff, not if your grades in school showed that you knowed stuff so eventually I have the things I need even if my grades make me feel dumb…and yeah, the final didn’t go so hot, but after seeing it to verify what I did wrong, I know that I definitely knew the material…isn’t great when the explanation as to why your answer is wrong is that actually that might be a really good idea, but we didn’t teach you to think like that…oh well…the world continues to turn whether I get an A or an F or anything in between.

Happy Christmas Merry New Year and whatever other holiday you want to celebrate, happy that!


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