Little did they know he’d turn their cry day to good Friday

(Good Day on a Bad Day – Fish Tales Musical)

So I was trying to find a video on youtube with clear enough audio to get the correct words to good day on a bad day…I failed at that, but did find one that made me smile…there was one with a kid in the back who likely had “special needs” and started jumping up and down when they sang that Christ rose again. It was super adorable. Also, I hate the term “special needs.” I mean, doesn’t everyone have special needs because everyone is uniquely gifted and everyone has their own weaknesses? How come my needs aren’t special?

So last night I realized that my nutrition has been missing one food group for a while…the calcium group…At home I only drink milk at dinner and I wasn’t home for dinner a lot of nights…and here I haven’t been to the grocery store because I hate the ambiance at grocery stores and I hate grocery shopping…and I don’t drink the same kind of milk as the people I live with so I can’t just share…and someone offered to buy me milk but I didn’t feel like drinking it right then anyway so I said no…

And to add to the problem, yesterday I got permission to leave school like 3.5 hours early…okay cool, right? Except, that meant I left around 3pm so I had no reason to try to get dinner in my mouth yet. The plan was that I would go to church, hang out, do homework, go to a meeting, then go back to school and eat and go to FCA. The plan was a decent idea…except I felt like I was going to fall off the swing and someone was already sitting at my other favorite spot so I was totally enthusiastic when asked about walking to the park and I didn’t do homework…or right the letter of intent that I should have also been writing. Then I wasn’t ready to leave church until like 15 minutes after FCA was supposed to start and I was exhausted and decided that I should probably just go back to the house. I am 90% sure there is a microwave at church I could have used…actually, I know where two of them are, but both of those are in places that I didn’t feel comfortable inviting myself. Side note…how many days can a raw egg stay in my lunch box before it goes bad? Assume that the lunchbox is not left in my hot car and that the egg goes back in the refrigerator from like on average 8:45pm to 5:05am…’cause there may be an egg in my lunchbox going on 3 days now…So yeah, I had a handful of rice chex for dinner. I had an egg and a couple rice chex and a starburst and a chips ahoy cookie for lunch. I had apple juice and 5 cheerios for breakfast…and so I got home and had most of my calories for the day in the form of chocolate and buttercream frosting…and even I am smart enough to know that it is not sustainable to get most of your nutrition from multivitamins and most of your calories from dessert…even if that is sorta similar to what I’d love to do all the time. Side note again that the biggest reason I take a multivitamin is because my counselor second year thought it would help my germ issues…yep, I as a pharmacy student took my medication advice from a counselor…but sometimes things stick and even though it took me a couple years to be ready to try taking a multivitamin (hello, germ issues), now I’ve done it pretty consistently for a while. I’m almost out and not sure that I’m going to buy more unless I can’t get my eating back on track, because thinking realistically, I don’t think I really need it. Mostly I eat kid foods that are already fortified with a bunch of stuff.

So anyway, all that to say that this is what success looks like:

Yep, that’s an empty yogurt pouch. I hate yogurt except the kind with the m&m’s in it and the froxen kind which is definitely NOT the same as regular yogurt frozen. Once I mixed coffee with vanilla yogurt and put it in the freezer thinking I’d have coffee frozen yogurt…umm, no. That might have been more gross than the time I forgot there was sprite in my cup and poured vanilla milk on top. So anyway, I gave myself the option of eating the pouch, stopping at the grocery store, or texting people that I was too irresponsible to take care of myself…and I picked the pouch. Plus, the pouch was going to expire soon so I was either going to need to eat it, find a way to use it in a recipe, or throw it away. And I am finding that I am a lot less picky when my body is hungry even if I am not hungry. Not even just the yogurt. Monday for dinner was chicken (okay, I can do that) with some kind of sauce on it (oh no…how do I be polite?!). At first I probably had less than the 6-year-old, but when offered more, I accepted. It wasn’t my favorite, but it wasn’t really so bad…

Sometimes my brain doesn’t process and respond to information the way I would hope it would. I’m kinda argumentative sometimes. On Wednesday I was asked about whom I was talking…and was like NO, it wasn’t (name) the (occupation), it’s (name) (other name)’s friend…umm, yeah…those are the exact same person…but to me it was totally different. When I talk to her in her occupation role, I act more professionally – smiley faces and doodled flowers are okay but that’s the limit to the cutesy-ness. When I talk to her in a friend role I can just be whatever me is in there whether that is the excessively introverted version or the bouncing off the walls version – I can just be me, whatever that means.

I am always me, because there ain’t anyone else I can be. I am the me who limbo’ed under the guard rails at the metro station because I didn’t hear a train coming and didn’t feel like waiting (success, I at least listened instead of just going and assuming there wasn’t one). Not everyone thinks like me. In class a couple days ago I was trying to explain why a water-based product will be drying…and I start talking about running water over your hands…and everyone looks at me like I’m crazy…yep, OCD makes you learn things that are very relevant to derm management…I am someone who knows what it is like to essentially have no skin oils on my hands for so long that feeling it on my skin was a trigger as the skin healed enough and washing frequency decreased enough for skin oil to come back…so yes, wet and dry are things with which I certainly have plenty of familiarity.

Yesterday I got two packages. One was my grad announcements…with the wrong name on them. Umm, yeah, not even close.

The other was from my parents…got a pair of headphones and a charger that I needed from my room at home. The headphones aren’t the pair I would have picked, but they probably were the most obvious because they are biggest since I use this pair for biking, but they work and now I can have music without bugging other people. Well, actually I guess I don’t need the charge so much anymore, because yesterday the library was giving out chargers for free…but now I have the same number of chargers as things to charge whereas before I had one charger and four things to charge.

There was another thing I was going to write about but Imma save it for later ’cause this is already getting too long and my homework isn’t getting done.

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