You Wouldn’t Care Anyway

(Someday – JJ Heller)

So, no one probably cares, but I’ve read some books lately that I enjoyed (and one that was less good)…and so I thought I’d share.

 

First I did the audiobook “3096 Days in Captivity.” It was super good. I could definitely relate to the I hate you and know this relationship is super wrong but I also need you and am so afraid of you that I don’t think I can safely leave or tell anyone what is happening. I felt like there were a lot of things that could have been addressed in the book that were left out, but there was so much I could connect to that made me really understand myself by seeing things through her words that I didn’t even care that much about the things that were left out.

 

Then I read the paper book “Resenting God.” The introduction and the first chapter were incredible. They talk about how as Christians people push toxic positivity and the happy mask on hurting people and over-spiritualize the pain almost as if we should be content with suffering and never feel angry or frustrated. As the title says, it talks about how sometimes in our pain we might even resent God and that is normal okay. I have to give the author a lot of credit for not adding on to that thought anything like but we won’t be stuck there forever. The rest of the book I felt like was a bunch of random stories that meant nothing to me with a few good sentences thrown in here and there, but the introduction and first chapter made the book more than worth it.

 

Next the audiobook “Girl on a Train.” As you might guess from the title, it is about a girl…who is on a train. The person next to her leaves a locket in her bag and then gets off the train and is subsequently hit by the train and dies. This leads to a story kind of like SVU in book form of the girl on the train trying to figure out the story of the person who owned the locket. It was super good, so I got nothing done for a day because I needed to know what happened next. Over the course of trying to discover the locket owner’s story, the girl also realizes maybe her husband’s suicide isn’t exactly as it seems. Overall I really liked it, and it was incredible how many of the little pieces of story suddenly came back later and you’re like wait cool I didn’t know that was going to happen!

 

Then I read the paper book “Therefore I Have Hope.” I was super duper annoyed when it came in the mail, because it was an advanced reader edition. I didn’t know it was legal to slap a price on one of those. I also did not appreciate not knowing in advance that was what I was getting. Considering the Amazon page I ordered from showed the real book rather than the draft and the book came out almost 11 months ago, it doesn’t make any sense to just spring an advanced reader copy on me. The book had paged that were just randomly blank and very obviously shouldn’t have been and had a lot of typoes – in some places these issues made the idea trying to be conveyed become nearly impossible to decipher. I am glad I made it through the book though, because I did really enjoy the book. The book is about a man who has always worried about the worst thing that could happen to him which he thinks would be losing his son and finding out his faith wasn’t enough and he’d let everyone down. Then his wife calls him and his worst is coming true – his three-year-old son died. The rest of the book explores his story through grief. Despite the title of the book, the author does not try to push hope down your throat or try to hand out the everything happens for a reason cop out. Instead, the man in the story talks about how incredibly painful and difficult grief is and while he does find some hope and joy in the end of the book which is a really beautiful bow at the end of the story, the book is very gentle in acknowledging that not every story will end with a beautiful bow turning the tragedy into a pointer towards something more. Considering how many grief quotes say something about how if it isn’t okay it isn’t the end and stuff it was really refreshing for someone to acknowledge that sometimes it just sucks and won’t really ever be okay. I absolutely loved this book. While it is written by a Christian, I think even a non-Christian going through a hard time could enjoy this story.

 

Then I did the audiobook “Cracked not Broken.” I expected to love it, but I hated it. The book is about a man who refuses help and can’t really decide if he should kill himself but ultimately decides to jump off the golden gate bridge. He accidentally survives. The author is obviously trying to use the rest of the book to talk about how it was some awesome turning point and means that there is always another answer…but in reality there is no turning point in the main characters life. Sure, the author doesn’t *actually* jump again, but he does continue throughout the entire book to return to suicide and becomes a behavioral health unit frequent flyer. He seems to think he is some almighty example to people everywhere of living well with mental illness, but he pretty much does the exact opposite. I’m not sure how this book even ever got anywhere close to press. It was awful. Uggh. I am not a book abandoner, so I was super pumped for the book to be over finally.

 

Finally, I most recently read the audiobook “Boundaries” by Henry Cloud and John Townsend. There were some really interesting ideas. It is a really short book, but I think if I slowed down and read short sections at a time I could get a lot out of it. A couple things that I still remember that were definitely food for thought: We think of mine mine mine as selfish, but without mine there is no self to give to God and nothing to share with those in need. Also, they explore how being compliant can be a form of control by voluntarily giving up power and handing it over.